


Winter solstice

by Matthew1972



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, First Time, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-15
Updated: 2014-09-15
Packaged: 2018-02-17 13:07:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,899
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2310704
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Matthew1972/pseuds/Matthew1972
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sent out by King Uther on Winter Solstice to investigate a rumour about a sorcerer hiding at an ancient druid temple Arthur and Merlin find more than they bargained for. Spirits of troubled souls gather in the snow and wind, but are they really out for blood? And can Arthur set aside all he has been taught when the man he secretly loves accidentally reveals who he truly is?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

 

* * *

Snow painted the hills of the Kingdom of Camelot white and what should have been a beautiful sight was in fact nothing but torment. Arthur's eyes were assaulted by the freezing wind and the falling hail, making it impossible to see. If he didn't know any better he would think an angry God was raining it down on him, not that he was superstitious of course. No… that was all Merlin.

"You should not have disturbed the spirits at the druid temple", his servant complained through chattering teeth. "These troubled souls of ancient druids are all awake now. You really did it this time…"

Arthur rolled his eyes in annoyance, for he could hear the unspoken words of "I told you so" between the lines. "This dreadful weather may just be a coincidence. Don't be such a girl, Merlin", he retorted. Half mumbled complaints were his only answer.

Silence once more fell between them while they both tried to stay on their feet. The effort of walking in this weather was taking a toll on them both. Arthur got more and more fed up with everything by the minute. Why did his father insist upon sending them out in this weather only because of the rumour a sorcerer hid in the temple? "It is only four leagues away, Arthur. If you ride fast you will be back in time before dinner", his father had persuaded him and being the faithful son he was he had to do as told.

Muttering his frustration when he slipped on an icy patch Arthur crawled back up and trudged on, wishing once more the horses weren't even more spooked than Merlin. He recalled how they reached the temple. He'd dismounted and walked off, but found his friend hesitate just outside the circle of stones. Looking over his shoulder he had ordered Merlin to help look for any trace of a man hiding within the large, ruined monument of times long gone.

Absolutely nothing was what they found. All they did was disturb a few critters and birds from their shelter between the stones before they'd stumbled upon a small pool of ice. Merlin had stopped him from walking on with his arm. "This place is sacred", he had half whispered, while his eyes nervously looked at their surroundings. If Arthur didn't know any better he would have thought his friend heard voices. "We should leave. It is better not to disturb the spirits buried here."

Should he have listened? Yeah maybe, but he didn't, of course not. Fool that he was he had to ignore anything to do with magic. One step, all it had taken was one step. The ice covering the surface of the small pool cracked under his boot and it was done, the spirits awoke… or so Merlin claimed. A cold eerie sound in the air around them spooked the horses and there was no stopping them from galloping away. The sun followed them into nothingness and snow began to fall. Had it been the final sign the spirits were angered?

Arthur knew he wasn't supposed to believe in the druids and their ways, his father would be furious if he ever did. However more and more a part of him wondered if Merlin had been right all along. When they'd left the temple they knew it would be a long hike at the best of circumstances, but it became near impossible with the drastic change in weather. Were they ever going to make it home?

*****

Cold, it was so cold. Merlin could no longer stop his teeth from chattering. His face felt impossible cold, as did his hands. Why did the prat feel the need to listen to Uther's latest whim? Of course someone had been at the temple. Some druid still visited their lost loved ones there and honoured the spirits. It was a grave! What did they expect?

To add on their troubles it happened to be winter solstice today. The longest night, or the shortest day… depending how you looked at it. Light was fading on them fast, for the early signs of dusk appeared in the sky. A hesitant pale moon rose early and it peaked out from between the snow filled clouds, as if to say it pitied the poor souls below.

Merlin trudged on, unhappy at the wetness of the snow seeping into his boots. His feet had long ago gone numb and the fact the track was going uphill was no help either. Two steps, catching his breath, three steps, tumble into the snow, getting back up, a few more steps and back to catching his breath. The struggle was wearing him down fast. His stomach grumbled with hunger, but he ignored it. A warm, dry place was what they needed most. Merlin desperately wanted to be out of the hail and the gloomy cold air.

Another tumble and Merlin found himself lying on his back in the snow. This time Arthur appeared at his side in a flash. Strong, ice cold hands grabbed his and pulled him up sharply. The unexpected and far too forceful pull made Merlin lose his balance again and then they were both down. Arthur's indignant yelp at the coldness of the thick layer of snow made Merlin giggle, in spite of their miserable situation.

"You clumsy…", Arthur faltered before he couldn't resist joining Merlin in the giggling. "Actually… you are quite warm, for a clumsy idiot that is", he deadpanned when they both finally managed to stop laughing for long enough. They each had yet to move, but it seemed they were both reluctant. With a wide smile Merlin realised Arthur was right. The warmth of another body below his was quite a good feeling. Maybe they could stay like this just a bit longer? His eyes locked with Arthur's and he was struck by the flicker of intense emotions in them. Could it be love?

Only in his dreams, the ones he would never speak of, did Merlin allow himself to think of being this close to his friend. The part of him deeply lost in his feelings for the infuriating, but handsome and courageous man only dared to dream. In the light of day he was a servant, far beneath Arthur's royal status. He stood no chance, or so he always believed. Arthur wanted a woman surely? So he squashed the feelings down and hid behind the jokes and insults. It was just easier on his poor heart this way.

"Get back up, Merlin. We can't stay out here", Arthur turned sensible again. Startled out of his dreamy thoughts Merlin jumped to his feet and helped Arthur up. "Right… we must get on with it. There's no rest for the weary", Merlin grumbled while he brushed the snow out of his hair. "Well, at least it has stopped snowing", Arthur insisted with a forced smile of encouragement.

*****

How come he had never noticed how handsome Merlin was? The unfathomable eyes, the pale cheeks, adorably large ears and lopsided smile… Arthur was suddenly struck by his best friend's appearance when they were lying sprawled in the deep snow. Merlin fitted so well against him and he'd been tempted to stay there together for a moment. Where had these thoughts come from? It didn't make sense. His manservant beautiful? The thought was ridiculous. He would marry a princess or a lady one day. No other man ever held his desire… and yet…

No one understood him the way Merlin did. Only his friend didn't sugar coat the truth. Only he spoke to him with an open heart and an unlikely wisdom for a lowly born man. There was something about Merlin, which made Arthur long for him when he wasn't around. Always would he look around the room to catch a glimpse of the deep blue eyes and silly smile. When he was down Merlin would help him up and if something upset him in turn Arthur wished for no more than to make him smile again. Damn his heart… he did have it bad!

The track was leading them uphill now. Every two steps forwards they were slipping one step back. The lack of proper progress was infuriating, but Arthur was stubborn and so he trudged on. Camelot awaited them, and not even the fading light turning to darkness stopped Arthur from reaching his target. No, he needed to get Merlin some shelter, even if it was the last thing he ever did. By now his friend looked scarily tired and cold, his lips had turned blue and his eyes empty of the sparkle they usually held. Arthur knew they had to keep moving onwards just to stay warm, but Merlin barely managed to keep up with his slowing place.

On top of the hill they stood together in silence for a moment. The pale light of the moon cast their path downhill in a silvery light. It was almost beautiful, but Arthur had no eye for it. Instead his eyes were drawn to the edge of the open field where a small wooden cabin promised shelter. "Merlin, look!" He nudged his friend's shoulder before he pointed to the cabin with hope in his eyes. "Come on", he said when Merlin nodded with a half smile of relief.

*****

"One foot before the other", Merlin muttered to himself. His lips were cracked from the cold, harsh weather. By now he had stopped shivering and this scared him more than anything else had done today. In the back of his mind he heard Gaius' warning voice, telling him it was hypothermia, but the words faded into the distance. Sleep, all Merlin wanted was to fall asleep right here.

With some effort Merlin remembered, "No… I mustn't sleep. Dangerous…cold…" the slurred words must have been spoken out loud for suddenly Arthur was at his side. "Merlin!" The worry in his voice made Merlin frown. "Didn't know… you… cared". With some effort the joke rolled of his lips. Blue eyes narrowed, "Of course I do. Come on, Merlin. Stay with me. I will get you there. Here lean on me."

A strong arm wrapped around his waist, keeping him up on his feet for a while longer. "Keep going", Arthur spoke at his side. There was an urgent edge and a slight wobble of fear in his voice. "Come on Merlin, don't give up on me now." With each step a huge effort Merlin began to stumble, leaning heavily on Arthur.

Deep down his magic fluttered in his veins, waiting to get out to help him. "No…", he whispered to it. "I can't… must never know… not here…" His thoughts barely made sense, but all he knew he could not let Arthur know he had magic. Pushing it back down with the last of his energy Merlin fell face down in the snow…


	2. Chapter 2

The slurred words had Arthur truly worried. What was Merlin trying to tell him? Arthur was about to ask when Merlin let go of his arm and fell face down in the snow. "No!", he shouted, "Merlin, wake up." Nothing happened and when Arthur touched a cheek he realised why. Merlin had gotten too cold; his well worn clothes too thin to keep him warm for long enough under these harsh conditions.

Gently Arthur lifted Merlin into his arms. With some difficulty he rose back onto his feet and trudged onwards through the snow, carrying Merlin over to the cabin. He knew he had to act quickly, or Merlin would never wake up again. The thought scared him far more than he was willing to admit to. Life without his friend seemed unthinkable. Arthur couldn't even bear thinking about it, so he shook the gloomy thought from his mind.

Finally he made it to the cabin. Arthur knocked on the door, but no one was there to open it and for a moment Arthur's heart dropped. Luckily the pathetic excuse for a door was easily opened and when he carried Merlin inside he prayed the hardest part was over. With a slam he shut the door behind them to lock the worst of the cold outside.

Cursing along the way it took Arthur far longer than it would have taken his friend to gather wood and light a fire. When he finally succeeded he took off Merlin's wet boots, socks and coat. Finding a frayed looking blanket he wrapped it around the lanky frame. "Come on... you can't die on me now. I know what happened was my fault, but please…" His whispered prayer was meant for any God, or Goddess, who would listen. "Please, let him wake up."

Suddenly he remembered their not so voluntary tumble into the snow. Body heat! Yes, of course… it was the best source of warmth available to them both. Moments later his cloak, chainmail and boots were dropped to the floor. After his tunic joined the messy pile of discarded items Arthur crawled under the blanket as well. He took a still terrifyingly cold Merlin into his arms. Rubbing the cold hands Arthur kept mumbling words of nonsense and of encouragement, until finally his own tired body needed to rest as well.

How long he'd been out he didn't know, but something woke Arthur up. Mumbled words tumbled from Merlin's lips. With a frown Arthur realised he didn't understand any of them. They almost seemed to be from a language long forgotten. "What are you trying to tell me?" No answer came to his question.

Unexpectedly Merlin's eyes opened, two orbs of pure golden light stared out into the half dark cabin, where only the light of the hearth offered some comfort. What was going on? The disturbing sight of forbidden magic made Arthur look around for any newcomer, a sorcerer maybe, or a druid. There had to be someone else present to cause this, or else… no he wouldn't let his thoughts go there.

The feeling of warmth crept into his side. Arthur could finally see the colour return to his friend's face and he realised magic caused the change. Merlin was healing himself, there was no other logical explanation for any of it. His heart broke, the enigma who was his friend was a sorcerer and he should fear him. But could Arthur truly fear the man he almost trusted more than he trusted himself? Was it really so wrong to fear the one single reason Merlin was able to survive his mistake?

*****

In his dream warmth returned to his body, pushed forward by his magic. The freeing power of nature and of pure golden beauty made him feel happy somewhere deep down in his heart. Awareness slowly returned to his mind. Their journey to the druid temple, the waking of troubled souls and then the track through the hail and snow. It had been so cold, but no more. No, he was feeling warm now. A solid body was pressed against his side and he felt safe. Whoever they were they grounded him…

Arthur, right… he was the one with him on this journey. The thought made Merlin smile. Waking up in his arms felt pretty good. Was he still dreaming? Of course it must be so, because the Arthur he knew would not get this close to him, not unless they were in serious trouble. With sudden shock Merlin realised what truly warmed him up and where he was. Magic… Arthur… the combination of the two was bad, very bad.

In shock Merlin blinked and opened his eyes, which only then returned to their normal blue. His own fear and worries echoed back to him from the depth of Arthur's eyes. "You… have magic." The statement was spoken softly and yet Merlin felt his heart drop at the sound. "I…"

A finger touched his lips to silence him. "All this time you hid in plain sight. All this time you lied to me. I trusted you, Merlin…" Merlin wanted to interrupt him to explain but Arthur shook his head. "And I have been a fool not to see it, haven't I? All the times you came with me on dangerous quests and you were seemingly brave beyond reason. You've always stood by my side, no matter of the law against your kind and today you warned me. I failed to understand and I nearly lost you because of it… I"

Only rarely had Merlin seen tears in Arthur's eyes, but now in the orange glow of the fire he could see them glisten on his cheeks. The words of acceptance filled his soul with joy. He could barely believe it. "I am still here", Merlin whispered against the finger still softly pressed to his lips. A tear of happiness escaped his eyes. "I always will be, Arthur. I use my magic for you, and for Camelot."

*****

The quiet words told Arthur all he needed to know. His clumsy servant and the sorcerer were one. His brave and loyal friend, the one he loved in silence felt the same way he did. It was there between the words and behind the lies. It was there in every single spell Merlin had cast to help and protect him, even while doing so meant he had to go behind the backs of those who feared and outlawed it. Merlin always watched out for him and now on this impossible day Arthur finally understood how he did it so well. Better yet, he understood why. It was for love and out of a strong loyalty.

He could fault Merlin for neither reason and so Arthur pushed aside all he was taught and listened to his heart. "It will be our secret", he whispered against Merlin's ear. The answering near moan and shiver at the unexpected contact were all he needed to hear. It touched him deeply Merlin seemed to want him in this way too.

"This one night here, let's make the most of it. Let us forget about laws for once and not fear tomorrow. Merlin please, allow me to be with you. Nothing between us, no rank, no magic and no boundaries. Just us…"

"Just us", came the soft reply filled with wonder and relief. Arthur smiled when he felt Merlin's lips against his throat before they made their way upwards. When their lips inevitably met sparks flew behind his closing eyelids. It felt so good, better than Arthur ever dared to dream. For once he would not think, only feel. "One night only", he whispered the promise when they came up for air.

Merlin nodded and kissed him again. The pleasure travelled down over his body fast and Arthur felt himself harden. The feeling was so good, for Merlin was just perfect. The way they melted against each other was something he'd remember forever.

Growing bolder Arthur snuck his hands under Merlin's tunic to explore his back. Eager hands soon returned the favour and their moves became more frantic. Their need to be together made common sense flee the cabin. Nothing existed but lips, hands and the love they shared in this moment.

Tunics were discarded, they were no longer needed to keep them warm anyway. The heat of their desire flared so high it could light the entire cabin and the clearing beyond. Merlin's chest was broader than Arthur expected. His muscles were strong, flexing beneath the pale skin as his arms moved to guide his hand's to Arthur's pleasure. The sight was enthralling, but Arthur didn't dwell on it.

With a surprising swift move Merlin had him on his back and Arthur grinned upwards. "Again, Merlin?" He couldn't help but tease. "A lopsided smile was the only warning he got before Merlin kissed his way downwards. Wet, sloppy and deliciously they fell against his heated skin. A nipple was sucked between soft lips and Arthur moaned at the spark of pleasure. "Please… more", the soft begs left his lips, but Arthur didn't even realise it.

Teasingly slow a tongue travelled further south. It stopped just above his waistband and Arthur looked at his friend, begging wordlessly for him to go on. Merlin though still hesitated and Arthur sat up, taking Merlin with him. Arthur trailed his hands over his friend's back, all the way down to his breeches. Slowly he moved to the front and felt for the laces, which kept the breeches up on Merlin's shallow hips.

Locking eyes with Merlin he slowly untied the laces before he gently pushed his hand inside. "I want to see and feel all of you", Arthur whispered. "No holding back…"

*****

Merlin nodded his permission with lust filled eyes. More than anything he wanted this, but a part deep down inside of him was afraid. Would Arthur still feel the same in the cold light of day? When a hand wrapped around him the part of his brain over thinking things shut down in favour of pleasure. "I want you too", he half moaned while he tried to unlace Arthur's breeches to repay the favour.

After some awkward struggling with the fabric their breeches were thrown to the side. Nothing was between them now, but sweat and skin. The frayed blanket was a mess below them, but they didn't care. All Merlin wanted to feel was the naked, soft skin and the hard muscles underneath it of his friend at his side. Finally he was where he wanted to be most.

The feeling of their frantic rhythm of hips against hips and hard length against hard length was enough. Slowly, but steady Merlin felt the passion and tension build. One more roll of his hips and then another. Suddenly without warning the world exploded in one searing ball of pleasure. "Arthur", he let out a cry at the same time Arthur moaned his name in bliss, a sound he would never forget again.

*****

While Arthur and Merlin fell asleep in the afterglow of their love making the world outside the cabin calmed down. The hail and stormy winds evaporated as if they'd never even had been there. The troubled souls went back to where they came from and all was right with the world again, or so the druids ordered it to be. Their rage at the disturbance of the ancient temple had come to an end when they witnessed the joining of the two men most important in all of Albion. The warlock Emrys and the Once and Future King Arthur Pendragon; it was said they were two halves of the same coin and the spirits believed the coin was about to become a whole…


	3. Chapter 3

The morning sunshine woke Arthur up. The sight of a naked Merlin lying at his side made him smile. In the early sunlight his friend looked perfectly at peace. There was no sign of their snowy adventure, other than a couple of bruises shaped like fingers on his hips. With a grin Arthur realised he'd held on a little too tight to Merlin.

Blue eyes opened, blinking against the bright light. They looked back at him with some shyness and a lot of happiness. Arthur smiled and said softly, so he would not break their final moment of peace, "Morning…" Without thinking he let his hand touch Merlin's cheek to check he was still warm enough. Soft lips found his fingers and kissed them. The need to touch and kiss returned with the innocent gesture. Arthur pulled Merlin close to kiss him good morning properly.

To his annoyance it was then that the spell between them was broken. The world outside had come to life. "Arthur! Merlin!" A voice called out their names, cutting through the silence. There was worry edged to it, as well as the sound of hooves. Sir Leon and a patrol of knights, they had come for them!

"The knights. They mustn't find us like this", Arthur whispered to Merlin while he jumped to his feet and helped his friend up as well. Father won't understand this… we can't… it can not go outside of here." Sadness filled his heart at the knowing nod of Merlin. "We always have this place. I won't forget", Arthur promised when he held him close for one moment longer than needed. "One night only, yeah?" Merlin whispered back, nearly choking on the words.

"I wish there was another way", Arthur admitted. "But right now I can't see any. If father finds out, he may banish you, or worse. Merlin, I can't bear it if I never saw you again." Reluctantly he let go with a final kiss. They had to get dressed and quickly, before Leon came barging through the door.

*****

A week had passed since their return to Camelot. Merlin knew he was withdrawn and often lost in thought. Gaius asked what was on his mind, but all Merlin dared to admit to his guardian was that Arthur knew about his magic and he would keep it a secret. How could he begin to explain how for one night he had everything he ever wished for, but he had lost it because Arthur wasn't brave enough and nor was he? How could he admit his heart belonged to another man, a royal prat at that?

Quietly he did his job, waking Arthur in the morning and then going about the long list of chores. From the shadows he watched his Prince go about his duty as well. Neither one of them was fooled by the excuses of the other. They parted only because of misguided laws and of rules royalty had forced themselves to live by, but their hearts were still joined.

Every single day Merlin saw his own longing to be with Arthur reflected back at him, even though Arthur guarded his feelings more carefully than ever before. Merlin could see Arthur still wanted him too, even though he was being stubborn and stayed away from him to please his father. It was in every accidental brush of fingers, or the way he looked at Merlin when he thought no one was watching.

"I'm sorry", Arthur whispered one day when they almost kissed in spite of everything stacked up against them. They had both drunk some warm ale at a banquet for a visiting guest. The ale had gone to their heads a little, making them feel a little too relaxed and their feelings left unguarded. In one clear moment Arthur had pulled back, shattering Merlin's heart in a million pieces again. His brain understood why Arthur felt he had to, but his heart was another matter.

Night after night Merlin fell into a restless sleep, only because his body craved rest. Yet his mind couldn't let go of his loss. In his dreams he returned to the cabin; the one place where he had been truly happy. He'd recall how Arthur had moaned at his touch, begging for more while he kissed him senseless. It all felt so right to have Arthur so close to him. To be parted felt like he was incomplete somehow, like half of him was missing.

*****

Every time Arthur caught a glimpse of his friend these days his heart skipped a beat. Butterflies fluttered in his stomach while his brain shouted, "No, you can't." Their love was impossible. A servant and a Prince; two men… one with a secret that could kill him. Yet Arthur could not give up on his love, not fully. Staying apart made them both more and more miserable. Something had to give.

It finally did when Arthur snapped at his father, just because he'd lain awake all night thinking of that one night of his life he had everything he ever wanted. He was send to his chambers to cool down, as if he was a small child caught with his hand on one of the cook's pies. Arthur bristled while he made his way over. Not only did he feel humiliated he also knew his thoughts would inevitably be drawn to Merlin when he sat all alone in his chambers. Without distraction to keep his mind busy who knew what he would do? Daydream? Or maybe finally he'd take Merlin to his bed and…

Walking into his chambers Arthur faltered. The object of his dreams was kneeling on the floor, scrubbing with abandon at spots which were barely visible. Frustration and misery oozed from his manners. The sponge was being abused for crimes Arthur committed. Right then and there Arthur was done with everything. Being careful sucked, especially when it caused them both such deep pain.

"Merlin", he called out while he dropped his cloak carelessly on the cleaned floor. "Stop doing that for a minute and come over here."

"What?" Merlin startled while he got on his feet. "Did I forget something? Did you want to insult me? What?" The last what followed when Arthur pulled the sponge from his hands. "No… none of these things. Merlin, I have been a fool."

"Again, you mean?" Came the quick remark. Arthur grinned at his own expense before he turned serious again to speak from his heart. "One night isn't enough for me, Merlin. I want more than that and you deserve more from me. I want to protect you, but I can't stand being parted from you. I… want you more than anything, but we have to keep it between these four walls. I wish…"

"Shh", Merlin said while to Arthur's happiness he came to stand so close to him they were standing toe to toe. "I am good at keeping secrets, Sire. You know that. I want this too, but not if you walk away from me again. I will not let you break my heart a second time."

Arthur nodded, "I won't break my own heart again either, Merlin. You have my word that from today on I will love you forever. Now please, just shut up and kiss me."

*****

Merlin looked deep into Arthur's eyes and found nothing but truth and powerful emotions of love shine back at him. With a flick of his wrist and a burst of magic he closed the door and locked it to keep the world outside at bay. "You have me. Truth is, you never even lost me." Without wasting any more of his breath he kissed Arthur full on the lips and pulled him close against him. Sighing he felt his heart mend at the contact.

After a while they parted, but Merlin let his forehead rest against Arthur's. "I will take my time showing you what you have missed. For every minute we were apart I will kiss you, touch you and let you beg." He snorted when Arthur frowned, "I never beg." Oh, how wrong was he? "You will learn to… "

With a wicked grin Merlin let his magic return to the front of his mind. One spell was enough to have them both naked in no time. "Merlin", the half objection ended on a moan when Merlin caught his nipple between his teeth. "You'd rather we wasted time on unwilling laces and tunics?" He wasn't surprised when Arthur shook his head.

Wasting no more time on words Merlin grabbed Arthur's hand and he pulled him with him to the royal bed. They sat down on it to lick and touch where they could reach. Soon every part of Merlin felt like it was on fire. All he wanted was right here, at the mercy of his fingertips and he was thrilled to know it was his for the taking.

He trailed down his fingers, pinching one nipple then another, before heading further south while pushing Arthur onto his back on the bed. "Please", there was the first hesitant beg. Merlin couldn't stop himself from smiling, but he was not yet ready to say "I told you so". Instead he kissed Arthur while he took him in his hand. The resulting moans rumbled against his chest.

A hand wrapped around him and like one they moved to get as much friction as they could. Legs entwined while moans filled the chambers. Kisses rained back and forth, while pleasure build deep inside Merlin. "Yes", he encouraged while his hands grabbed Arthur's buttocks. Accidentally his fingers slipped in the crack and Arthur moaned, "That feels so good." Merlin did it again and he felt a shiver of pleasure run across his lover's spine. "Yes… I need… more. Merlin, please make love to me."

There was the beg he longed to hear. Merlin smiled against Arthur's chest while he whispered, "I got you…" He kissed him once more while he let his spit slicked fingers explore further. After a while he carefully slipped one inside and found no resistance. "You want this?" Merlin asked, just to be sure. Blue eyes locked upon his when Arthur said breathlessly, "I want all of you this time, Merlin. Don't hold back on me now."

*****

Arthur knew he was begging and he didn't care. With Merlin he could and would always be himself. He trusted him, even more so today than he ever had before. Merlin waited until Arthur was ready to act on his feelings, ignoring his own broken heart just to give him space to come to terms with it. Yet another quiet statement of how much he meant to Merlin.

In the privacy of his chambers they were one and it was all they could have for as long as his father reigned. Arthur would cherish their secret love for as long as he did, but the day he would be crowned King would be the day he came out with the truth. Merlin deserved as much, and so did he himself. It was the vow he silently made for them both.

Without any shyness or hesitation Arthur rolled onto his stomach to allow Merlin to touch him even deeper. After a few strokes a wave of blind pleasure sparked to life from deep inside of him. "There… please… Merlin", Arthur begged to be touched there again and he wasn't disappointed when Merlin did as asked a few more times.

Before he could moan at the loss of the fingers Merlin slipped inside. The intimate feeling of it almost took Arthur's breath away and he quickly forgot the slight hint of pain when Merlin began to move, brushing against the bundle of nerves that set him on fire. This perfect rush of feelings was how it should be. Why had he even tried to ignore what he truly wanted?

Eager to pull everything out of Merlin he had to offer Arthur met each thrust of hips with one of his own. Time and time again the move set off the sparks of blind passion and he could feel himself drown in the pure pleasure of the intimate act. "Merlin", with a final shout of his lover's name he lost himself in bliss.

Over the rush he heard Merlin moan in a deep, lust filled voice. The sexy sound was followed by one more thrust and then Merlin was spent too.

In silence they were lying side by side, trying to catch their breaths. They stared into each other's eyes in awe; speechless and ridiculously happy. Winter solstice from that day on would always have a special place in their hearts. It was the time they found out where they truly belonged and how close they truly were…


End file.
